Self Help

A Better Way – How To Make Your Spirit-Based Business A True Success

In my last blog post, I shared with you some of the challenges we, in the healing arts and spirit-based businesses face to have greater reach and true success. From the dilemmas of technology to the offensive nature of most marketing strategies, it can be a real challenge to have success through service. But there IS a better way

A Better Way

I’ve just completed something specifically for you: a simple, step-by-step video course to help you easily get your business – your Life Work, Purpose and Service – online. I know, from learning these skills first-hand, that when you use this program, it will completely change the way you run your business and actually transform it so you can have true success with your life’s Passion and Purpose.

The Program is called Marketing with Heart, and I designed it specifically for folks in the Healing Arts, Teaching, Coaching, Arts and Yoga industries.

7 Wonderful Things about Marketing with Heart

1. Reach a MUCH greater audience.

The internet has changed the world – and the way we do business. When we grew up, small business owners, “Mom and Pop Shops”, chance of success was based on 2 things: Geography and Competition. But the internet changed the game. Today, geography is irrelevant. Why? Because the marketplace has gone global! This changes the nature of ‘competition’ too. Instead of a few big contenders fighting over a finite set of consumers, even very small businesses can build a niche of loyal clients and customers – anywhere in the world.

2. The deep SATISFACTION of serving more people – worldwide!

With global reach comes greater opportunity to make a real difference in the world. Marketing with Heart isn’t just about selling ‘stuff’ online. It’s about bringing your unique message, your service and gifts to the world – and to people worldwide who are looking for what you have to offer.

3. The ease of making MORE MONEY doing what you love to do.

Let’s face it – a work life in service to someone else’s dream only goes so far on the Satisfaction Scale (to say nothing of the income scale!) But when you do what you love to do – AND ‘make a living’ doing it, your life starts to flow with ease and greater happiness.

4. FREEDOM from the limits of geography.

Do what you want, go where you want, when you want, without being bound to place or a dreaded time clock. When you free your income from your ‘man’ hours, life changes drastically. Instead of calculating vacation time based on years in service to your employer or how many bucks you’ll lose while you’re away, you can set your business up to run without constant input. You set yourself free!

5. The EMPOWERMENT of no longer being vulnerable to overpriced web developers and services providers.

Outsourcing is a good thing. But being totally dependent on someone to create, operate and make changes to the important parts of your business is just not smart business sense! With the abundance of simple, powerful tools available today, there’s just no excuse for paying thousands of dollars just to be dependent on someone else. When you set up the foundational elements of your business, you empower yourself to make changes and improvements as your business grows.

6. CONFIDENCE that you’ve got a ‘scalable’ system to grow with your business.

There’s nothing quite as assuring as the feeling of confidence – in any endeavor. And when it comes to the business of your business, wouldn’t you rather rest assured that you can handle all the key elements easily and flexibly as your business grows?

7. SELF-RESPECT through marketing that’s authentic and reflects who you really are.

If you’ve struggled with ways to promote your business that are in alignment with your values, you’re definitely not alone. Old-school marketing relied on tactics that many of us find appalling: interruption, false promises, sly influence and mediocre offerings. But today, the way people search for and choose what to buy is different. Its about who you are, and the quality of your service.

Are you ready for a better way to run your business – one that will let you serve to a greater capacity AND have greater success? Then it’s time to shed your fears about technology and your doubts about marketing to explore what’s truly possible in today’s interconnective world!

Where Service & Marketing Meet

Dawn DelVecchio is a writer, speaker, self-empowerment coach and online entrepreneur. After decades in pursuit of spiritual growth and personal development, Dawn had the opportunity to work with one of the most successful online marketing companies in the fields of Wellness and Personal Growth.

Bridging the Gap

Dawn recognized the need for a way to bridge the gap between Master Healers and Teachers, and the new world of online marketing. Thus was born “Marketing with Heart – How to Build your Tribe Online”, a program designed specifically for Healers, Teachers, Coaches and Artists who want to share their gifts with a greater audience, but need help with the basics of building an online presence.“Marketing with Heart coaches those with Spirit-based businesses how to leverage the web with Authenticity, Heart & no confusing ‘Geek Speak’.”

Beating a Bully at His Own Game

by Sandy Crowe

Last night I was walking my dog in a condo neighborhood next to my complex. As I allowed her to sniff her way around the trashcans and underneath stairways, a woman approached me and asked, “Do you live here?” I was taken a bit aback by the question but responded without much thinking: “No, why, do you?” She said “Yes,” and so I asked, “Are you bothered by my dog sniffing around here?” She said yes, and then immediately a friend who was with her chimed in, “Where is the bag for your dog?” I said, “In my pocket.”

I was perplexed by the interrogation that bordered on inappropriate, by what I experienced as intimidating and possibly even bully-like behavior. But what stunned me even more was what happened next. The woman saw my dog and said, “Oh, I love labs. She is so cute. What a wonderful dog. Isn’t this a great night?” I said yes, and seeing that her friend was afraid, assured her that my dog was friendly. She then wished me a “wonderful evening with my wonderful dog,” and we headed our separate ways.

As I walked away, I couldn’t help but wonder, why had they felt such entitlement in approaching and interrogating me as to why I was allowing my dog to sniff in their neighborhood? Why did they feel the need to do with admonishment and righteousness? But more than this, why did they so dramatically turn around their “attack”-mode behavior to a “more friendly” demeanor within a matter of seconds?

Bullying behaviors come in all forms and ages. It’s not just the guy who tries to beat you up in the playground anymore; it’s also the coworker who sabotages your work, or the mean girl down the hall looking for some way to reset your reputation. Behaviors such as gossiping, back-stabbing, screaming, and even passive aggressive actions can be seen as subtle forms of adult bullying. If the intention is to demean, dishonor, or discredit you in some fashion, then you may have an adult bully on your hands. Whatever form it comes in, here are five things for you to “get” so your bully can be gotten.

  1. Get beyond defensiveness: Because bullies can be attackers (verbally as well as physically), you may find yourself in the defensive position of proving how “right” you are. The problem is that if they believe you, they will have to change their assessment about you, meaning they will have to admit they were wrong on some level and no bully wants to do that. Instead, go past the defensiveness by asking a question: “So what if I am . . . What difference would it make?” or “If it were true, so what?” By doing this, you ride past the judgment and don’t spend the time defending yourself. You literally go past it and put the onus back on them to defend themselves.
  2. Get to disengagement: Many people feel that because someone is engaging them they have to interact back. I have clients who have been involved with a number of inappropriate emails, and my advice was to not respond (unless it was threatening and needed to be redirected). They didn’t, and the emails stopped. Reward the behavior you want to see repeated. No reward, no repeat.
  3. Get help: If the behavior seems threatening on any level, then report it to an EEO person, security, or even the police so that it is on record. You may never need a follow-up, but this may have happened with others and you want to stop it earlier rather than later. I had a friend whose dog was bitten by a neighbor’s dog. The neighbor didn’t take any responsibility for the incident, so we reported it to the authorities. Turns out, there were 10 other reports on the dog, and they took action against her. There is power in numbers and in reporting.
  4. Get strong: I’m not talking about going to the gym, but internally finding the place inside of you to stand up to him/her. Bullies look for weakness. It reminds them of the weakness they feel inside themselves. Many of them may have been bullied in the past. The victim often becomes the victimizer. Magnify your own strength by finding and activating your center. Find your center by placing two fingers below your belly button and focusing there. Just as in tai chi, martial arts, yoga, or Pilates, you are centering from the core and gaining strength. In addition, say, “I am dealing with this situation with strength.” Notice how your confidence goes up and your fear diminishes.
  5. Get out: No reason for you to stay in a conversation that doesn’t serve you. If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed or you can’t cope, leave the interaction. You can say, “I’m done,” or “Let’s continue this another time,” or even “I’m not going to participate in this,” setting your boundary and accessing your strength.

In any case, what you will find is that by implementing these behaviors, you will not only decrease your bully incidents, but they will look for someone else to bother, somewhere else to go, and someplace else to get their needs met. So, how did I answer the question posed earlier about why the woman changed her behavior? For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. I realized that she came down because there was nothing to bump up against in me. I didn’t argue, attack, or defend. I was easygoing and calm, and she realized there was no threat. No threat, no reason to threaten. This will work for you, too. Take away their reason to threaten, and they will have to go somewhere else. No cheese in this rat trap. Own it.

Healing Business Success – How To Make A Difference And Thrive!

Is your Healing Arts practice Thriving?

If you’re a healing arts practitioner or spirit-based business owner, I have a question for you: is your healing business a success?

The reason I ask is because I’ve known many gifted teachers, healers, artists & coaches who struggle. Sometimes they struggle to make ends meet, sometimes they struggle to reach and serve a greater audience. Either way, they’re unable to Thrive or Make a Powerful, Positive contribution to the world beyond their geographic community.

I understand. I used to be this way too. Until I learned how to use the internet.

Why the Internet is Perfect for Authentic Peeps like You

Let’s face it, ‘old-skool’ marketing tactics are cheezy and inauthentic – the very antithesis of what we as healing arts practitioners & spirit-based business owners want to be. This makes the internet your best friend, and here’s why …

The old ways of doing business based on big ‘hits,’ big fame and big advertising bucks are over. Today, business, and especially conscious business, is about people connecting with those who share your values.

It’s all about being REAL

Forget the false promises and exaggerated claims of old-style marketing! In today’s world, it’s all about being REAL …

Why? Because the internet lets everyone get specific about what they want and what they’re willing to spend their money on. This means you don’t have to appeal to ‘the masses’ for success. In fact, the opposite is true! People want more authenticity and specificity, so by being your true self, you become more appealing to others.

You can be exactly who you are and still find success – without compromising your values, watering-down your products and services, or over-extending yourself to try to please everyone.

But How??

How can you use the web for real success if you’re not ‘techy’? I’m talking about using the internet to help people find you, to build a tribe of like-minded peeps, and to have greater success doing what you love.

The problem is that if you’re like most people, you don’t now where to begin when it comes to online business success. More than that, you’re probably uncomfortable ‘marketing’ yourself – even though you know that what you have to offer can be of great service to many.

Your busy schedule keeps you from ‘dealing with’ this internet stuff. And when you finally do sit down to figure something out, you’re tripped up by all kinds of technical ‘geek speak,’ hardware annoyances and other nonsense that just doesn’t make sense!

But there IS a better way for you to have healing business success. And in my next blog post, you’ll find out all about it :) so stay tuned, there’s more to come …

Where Service & Marketing Meet

Dawn DelVecchio is a writer, speaker, self-empowerment coach and online entrepreneur. After decades in pursuit of spiritual growth and personal development, Dawn had the opportunity to work with one of the most successful online marketing companies in the fields of Wellness and Personal Growth.

Bridging the Gap

Dawn recognized the need for a way to bridge the gap between Master Healers and Teachers, and the new world of online marketing. Thus was born “Marketing with Heart – How to Build your Tribe Online”, a program designed specifically for Healers, Teachers, Coaches and Artists who want to share their gifts with a greater audience, but need help with the basics of building an online presence.“Marketing with Heart coaches those with Spirit-based businesses how to leverage the web with Authenticity, Heart & no confusing ‘Geek Speak’.”

Your Deep Love Strategy . . . You Might Just Be Surprised, Part 2

“What’s Your Deep Love Strategy?”

 by Christel Hughes

 

In Part 1 of “Your Deep Love Strategy,” we recognized that each of us desires Love and has an extremely unique strategy for what it takes to calculate LOVE deeply within and actually feel totally and completely loved up.

I created LovesCode: an original idea that flowed from the science of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), which shares the concept that there are three primary methods of communication that we all unconsciously use:

 

1. Visual: what we see.

2. Auditory: what we hear.

3. Kinesthetic: what we feel.

 

In the LovesCode Relationship Strategies program, we teach that Love Strategies flow along the lines of those three methods of communication and are known as representational systems. Here are a few guidelines you can use to determine your Love Strategy and the strategy of your partner/significant other. [Note: These guidelines should be used by both partners.]

First, ask your partner the following questions, using these exact words. [In each case, ask your partner to respond with a simple yes or no and to say the answer that first pops into their mind. No thinking or analyzing—only using their intuition.]

 

Question 1: “In order to feel totally and completely loved, do you need to see it through displayed actions?”

 

If you get a no, ask the question for the next strategy.

 

Question 2: “In order to feel totally and completely loved, do you need to hear the words, ‘I love you’?”

 

If you get a no, ask the question for the last strategy.

 

Question 3: “In order to feel totally and completely loved, do you need to be touched in a certain way?”

 

Now let’s move on to the next process . . . testing it!

If your partner said they need to see it, experiment with doing some acts of love that express Love to them Visually (in different ways) over the next few weeks, then follow-up and notice the impact they have.

If they said they need to hear it, experiment with communicating to them in different ways in the next few weeks so that they can hear your words of Love, then follow-up and notice the difference it makes.

If they said they need to feel it, experiment by asking your partner/significant other to share with you the special ways they would like to be touched. Which areas of their body? What is the amount of pressure they prefer? Is it in a very specific place or a general area? Play with this over the few weeks, then follow-up and notice the change it creates in your capacity to connect.

If you don’t discover you or your partner’s strategy using this method, ask the following questions to discover the Deep Love Strategy or to find clues that’ll lead you to your Deep Love Strategy.

 

Question 1: “What do I desire from my partner above all else?”

 

Question 2: “What have I most often requested from my partner?”

 

Question 3: “What have I most often noticed as missing in my relationship?”

 

Take the time to discover your Deep Love Strategy today and that of your partner. It will make a huge difference in your relationship and in your own emotional quality of life. It allows for you to get to know yourself more deeply and build up a sense of Self that you can now share with others for greater harmony.

 

Lastly, you can ask each other the following questions and discuss your answers:

 

Question 1: “How do you know you are loved by somebody?” [Example: They listen to you, respect what you like, are considerate to your wants and needs, share time and energy.]

 

Question 2: “Can you remember a time when you were totally loved?” [Example: A specific time? A memory that has been consciously held to make you feel good in the bad times?]

 

Question 3: “In order to know you are totally loved, is it necessary for you: a) to be taken places and bought things or to be looked at with that special look, b) to hear that special tone of voice or those special words, or c) to be touched in a certain way or in a specific place?”

 

When you are truly in your hearts and aligned with the way that you want to be loved, then you can create Magic in your relationships and start to feel Alive with the dance of Light and Love. This Love then ripples out across the Globe and inspires Unity and Harmony.

 

You can click on this link to access the LovesCode downloadable PDF and Video Series: http://soulmatealchemy.com/lovescode-what-is-your-love-strategy/. Please let me know if you have any questions regarding the LovesCode Relationship Strategies program so we can uncover even more wisdom of the heart and get you on the path of greater Love unfolding for holistic wellness.

 

Living Deeply in Love,

Christel Hughes, C.Ht.

Your Deep Love Strategy . . . You Might Just Be Surprised, Part 1

“What’s Your Deep Love Strategy?”

by Christel Hughes

Think about the common thread that runs through all people. We all desperately want to experience Love, yet we all have extremely unique “strategies” for what it takes to calculate LOVE deeply within and actually feel totally and completely loved up.

I created LovesCode, an original idea that flowed from the science of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), which shares the concept that there are three primary methods of communication that we all unconsciously use:

  1. Visual: what we see.
  2. Auditory: what we hear.
  3. Kinesthetic: what we feel.

In the LovesCode Relationship Strategies program, we teach that Love Strategies flow along the lines of those three methods of communication and are known as representational systems. Some people rely on Visual strategies for experiencing love, some rely on Auditory love strategies, and others recognize love with Kinesthetic strategies. What do I mean by that exactly? It breaks down in the following way

 

  • Visual Representational Love Strategy: People who have this strategy need to “see” that you love them. Seeing love takes the form of receiving flowers or unexpected thoughtful acts, such as a special romantic evening or getaway, a massage, or a day of pampering. People with this strategy need to see “evidence” or “proof” that you love them. They enjoy being surprised with expressions of love as gifts because it translates into you thinking about them.
  • Auditory Representational Love Strategy: Individuals with this strategy need to hear the words “I love you” or similar tender expressions or words to feel totally and completely loved. They thrive on you voicing the feelings of connectedness and relatedness. They want to hear a positive, loving tone of voice when you are sharing about them.
  • Kinesthetic Representational Love Strategy: People using this strategy need to be caressed in certain ways or in certain places to feel totally and completely loved. It might be, for example, massaging their shoulders a certain way, kissing a specific area of their neck, rubbing their lower back, and so on. It should be noted that this strategy rarely involves touch of a sexual nature. Rather, touching translates into care and understanding.

 

In the LovesCode Relationship Strategies program, we teach that if you don’t know what your significant other’s Love Strategy is and if you don’t use it on a regular basis, they will never feel totally and completely loved by you, no matter how many times you use another strategy. And ultimately, that’s not good for creating a healthy relationship.

Now, before we go on, I must explain that we all like being shown that we are loved using all three strategies, but we all have one that is our preferred mode. In order to have the most powerful impact on your mate, you will want to discover and explore their preferred strategy.

I remember finding out my Love Strategy, and what I discovered was that my choice to experience love was through the Visual Love Strategy. This gave me great insight into past relationships and assisted me in communicating with my current mate about exactly what my needs were. The Visual Love Strategy means that you can tell me that you love me all you wanted and touch me in many different ways, and while I might experience those gestures as being pleasant, they wouldn’t really excite me totally and completely. I personally needed to “see” by actions taken and expressed through surprises, gifts, and treats.

So take a moment to write down your thoughts about your love preferences. Think back over the years and your past relationships and what truly made you feel loved up. And in the next part of this series, I will share some specific guidelines that will support you in discovering you true Deep Love Strategy.

 

In Love,

Christel Hughes, C.Ht.

Soul Dance or Ego Dance: Attracting and Creating Fulfilling Relationships

By Sunil Ahuja

Are you looking for that perfect relationship, or is your relationship not quite as perfect as you want it to be?

That’s because our intimate relationships are mostly based on fantasy—a subconscious, idealized image and a belief that a partner who matches this fantasy image will bring us bliss and fulfillment. As a coach, I constantly find myself working with clients wanting to attract a “soul mate” with a long list of attributes and qualities that somehow define the prospective lover as their “type.” It is the rare client who actually questions why they think this list of characteristics is important.

It doesn’t interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire
with me and not shrink back.

Oriah Mountain Dreamer

Occasionally, through the mysterious workings of the Law of Attraction, we do meet someone who matches that list, and we match their conscious or unconscious ideal. Of course, we experience the excitement and thrill of falling in love and lust, and think it will last forever. Then, inevitably, gaps in the ideal appear, because no real person can live up to our unconsciously developed fantasies. This is the ego dance.

This is the point where there is an opportunity to be real, to create an authentic relationship. Most of us, though, preferring fantasies to reality, end the relationship, or stay in it but with an undercurrent of dissatisfaction. Authentic and fulfilling relationship, however, lies in engaging fully with and loving the real person, not with desiring a mental image that can never provide what you are looking for.

As consciousness in physical form, we have two fundamental desires—to become ourselves, a whole individual living and expressing our divine potential, and to be in deep contact with source, with life, and with each other. Intimate relationship is the fire in which both these aspects, the masculine and feminine, emerge and are refined. This development requires the willingness to be present, to be open-minded, heart, body, and soul—and to surrender to love itself. This is the soul dance.

So, how do we move from the ego dance to the soul dance? This requires that we understand what makes relationships work, why they fail so often, and how to consciously attract relationships that will grow with us.

Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and right doing,
there is a field. 
I will meet you there.

Jalal ad-Din Rumi


Relationships, like life, are a development process and practice, not an ideal to live up to. Recognizing and understanding that authentic partnerships have to be consciously created and do not just appear because you find the “one right mate” provides the framework in which you can engage in the soul dance.

 

For more information about our Soul Dance Workshop, visit our website http://integral-transformation.com/souldance.html.

What Is Your Energetic Contribution? Energy Drains vs. Energy Gains

by Christel Hughes

Everything is energy. Our bodies are made up of energy; they are like a container that holds energy. And we can feel when we are “low” energy or “high” energy.

We all have the ability to feel the energy of an expression. A look that someone gives us has a feeling to it as well: sometimes sweet and sometimes not.

We can also notice the energy of a room. How it is decorated leads us to feel the energy of that space. How the furniture is arranged and the colors selected all have an effect on how we feel when we are in that room. Think about your favorite spot in your house or your favorite cozy chair and the way it makes you feel so relaxed and peaceful.

An event can also be said to have an energy to it. Think of how you feel at a wedding. There is Love in the air and it feels Joyful. But I’m sure we have all also walked into a room where the people were in conflict or in a debate over something—we might use the expression, “You could cut the tension with a knife.” This common expression identifies the energy as thick . . . thick enough that you could cut through it.

Now that you have a greater understanding of energy and how energy can affect you and those around you, you have the power to choose. In sharing your time with others, whom would you choose? What kind of situations do you want to find yourself in? What kind of space (inner and outer) do you want to design? What kind of environment do you want to create for yourself, your loved ones, and the world?

Our thoughts, beliefs, and patterns cause our actions and reactions in life. What actions are you doing now that promote a positive boost in energy? How are you contributing “good” energy to others? Are you causing energy drains or energy gains in your relationships?

In my upcoming Boundaries e-course, we will be discussing the top 5 energy drains and how to shift your mental conditioning so that you are contributing positive energy to yourself, those you love, and to your life. Let’s identify the first of the 5 biggest energy drains that prevent a life of healthy boundaries and vitality: complaining.

  • Consequence: Complaining creates a massive leak of energy and sends negative vibes throughout the environment like a fast spreading virus.
  • Solution: The Ten Minute Rule

 With my friends, we have the Ten Minute Rule. If we want to complain to each other, we must first preface by saying, “I just need to get this out, will you listen?” Then we give the complainer ten minutes to simply empty out all his or her feelings and emotions surrounding the situation. After ten minutes, we move on to digging deep to discover where the root of the issue lies within the complainer:

  • Why is this reflection here for the complainer to see?
  • What can she/he learn from it?
  • What does she need to let go of to be freed from this happening again?
  • What attitude must be shifted to come back into a state of alignment with her Higher state of being vital?

You deserve an inspiring life, full of vitality and joy. Join me on one of our future live calls where you will be able to ask your questions and discover your personal energy drains and how to shift them into energy gains (www.christelhughes.com).

Blessings, and I am looking forward to connecting with you soon,

Christel

From Stressed to Blessed . . . Setting Healthy Emotional Boundaries

by Christel Hughes

Many of us end up juggling a dizzying array of stresses throughout the day. We have been taught to just “buck up” and take it, as if that’s just how life is . . . stressful. But do you have to live as a circus performer, trying to juggle all of the many aspects of life? Is there a way to get through life without performing a crazy balancing act?

Perceived stress in your environment triggers an emotional response in the body. Stressful emotions held in the body may show up as fatigue, exhaustion, and nervous tension. So let’s start with the following questions. How do you keep your environment from influencing your emotional/physical state of being? How do you set healthy emotional boundaries?

Let me give you one quick tip that can help you to not physically take on the stress in your environment so that you can have a healthier and happier life. You would do well to block the emotional triggers by recognizing that what is occurring in your space has nothing to do with you. That’s right! I know it sounds a bit curious, but what if the emotional balls of stress that are being flung around you really have nothing to do with you personally?

By taking the Witness stance in your perception, you can observe the events in your environment as if you are watching a movie play out. In my training with NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming), we learn about a process called dis-association. This is not “checking out”; this is powerfully choosing. When we take over our power of perception by choice, we have more control of what influences our emotional state and, therefore, the stress on our life and body.

So it’s up to you. If you don’t choose to juggle with the stress balls of life, then you can simply set them down and make another decision—to leave the stresses where they are, to not carry them around with you or play with them. The next time a stressful situation occurs in your space, just observe it as “interesting,” not taking it on. This will give your mind the healthy emotional capacity and time to create a positive solution instead of getting wrapped up in a juggling act.

Choose to be Blessed instead of stressed. Just let the balls of stress be, so that you can BE . . . less stressed and even Blessed!

 

Note: This tool is a snippet taken from Christel Hughes’ e-course, Lighting Up the Edges of Your Boundaries: How to Not Be the Dumping Ground of Others’ “Stuff.” Whether you want to overcome worry and anxiety, achieve greater degrees of healing, break free of inhibiting behaviors that are keeping you trapped, or bring more peace and happiness in to your life, this e-course gives you the tools you need to conquer the inevitable stresses of life with determination and ease. Ultimately, you are sure to be inspired and empowered with a variety of techniques to apply to your everyday life for years to come. Check it out here: http://www.ChristelHughes.com.